Saturday, January 19, 2013

Mama Laura's Sweet Beef

Man, if that post title doesn't bring folks lookin' for porn, I don't know what will. 

Speaking of porn, I posted a photo of tonight's dinner on Facebook because I love me some food porn, and a recipe was requested. I obliged in a Facebook note, but there was a desire expressed to be able to pin that bad boy. And here we are. 

Honestly, given that I haven't blogged in what, months?, I really thought my first post back was going to be a life-story. Like about the storytelling competition I started here in Fargo. Or about Mike getting his first apartment. Or our new kitten, Penny. Or that time I accidentally showed Louie Anderson my lady parts. 

I guess that one will have to be told another time. 

Tonight, I come back to blogging glory to give you Mama Laura's Sweet Beef. 

A conglomeration of hundreds of recipes online, in cookbooks and on that thar tee-vee, we use cheap beef (because we're not the friggin' Rockefeller's donchya know) and there's very little to it—making it a go-to on nights when we're fighting the siren song of fast food. 

  • 1 lb beef (eye of round, chuck round; whatever ... it doesn't have to be expensive. Lord knows mine wasn't.)
  • 1.5 to 2 T cornstarch

Slice into thin strips, then sprinkle lightly with cornstarch. Don't let the beef sit in the cornstarch for more than 20 minutes or it will get mushy. 

  • 1/2 c soy sauce (not that light shit, either)
  • 3 or 4 green onions, sliced (shallots or any kind of onion work; 'bout a 1/3 c)
  • 1/2 c brown sugar (light or dark) + 1/3 c more for later 
  • 1 1/2 T rice vinegar (or regular ol' white vinegar)
  • 1/4 t ground ginger (or fresh if you're Martha Damned Stewart and happen to have some laying around)
  • 1 t ground black or white pepper
Mix all of this bidness together. Use a whisk if you're feeling fancy. (Tonight, I used my fingers. True story.)

Marinade beef in this mixture for as little as 10 minutes, as long as one hour. Give 'er a stir at some point to make sure the sugar isn't laying down on the job.

Cook over medium to medium-high heat in whatever oil you've got until beef is about 2 minutes from the way you like it. If you're showing off and making veggies as well, toss 'em in about half-way through. Just before it's cooked to the desired "doneness" (I hate that word), throw in another 1/3 c brown sugar in and stir the bejesus out of it. 

Jazz hands, bitches. Jazz hands.